I was so torn about reviewing this movie that I have managed to distract myself for a week before coming to the inevitable conclusion, despite my own predilection towards Keanu Reeves, that "Street Kings" isn't actually very good.
I wanted it to be. It's been a while since my darling Keanu's last film ("The Lake House" - quite good all round with only a few weak spots) so I was hot for some Action Keanu along the lines of "Speed". (Don't get me started on "Point Break"; nothing can beat the glory that is Johnny Utah.)
I went on opening night, with Mr. Monkey (aka "WiseGuy") who sometimes indulges me in my Keanu fetish. Besides, there was going to be guns and blood and stuff, so that helped. It co-starred Oscar-winning Forrest Whittaker, so I assumed The One was going to be in good company.
Who knew this was the film where Forrest mugs and hollers and generally over-acts for the first time in his life? Not I. Who knew that Jay Mohr was going to wear a laughably-weird 70's porn-stache that just wasn't cool - unlike a certain New Zealander who comes to mind...?
And, saddest of all, who knew that when Keanu's character, Tommy 'is he a bad cop or is he the only good cop' Ludlow gets shot in the shoulder, he DOESN'T TAKE HIS SHIRT OFF!!?
Come on people! He gets shot in the arm and you have him roll up his sleeve rather than show me some wicked 40 year-old abs -- which should be my God-given, hard-earned $8.50, R-rated, Friday night RIGHT, for goodness sake! -- well, something is seriously wrong with this movie.
I'm not even going to review the plot, I'm too depressed. It was okay, but no one reinvented the wheel here and it got a little convoluted at the end. And did I mention, Keanu remained clothed?
;)
Two bananas.
3 comments:
There is a chance, a very very good chance, that after THAT film, I may never indulge your KR fetish again. I'm just saying.
Good lord it was bad. Bad, bad, bad, bad. The dialogue, the acting, the acting, the acting. Oh, and the cinematography too. It seems there was only a close-up lens available at Panavision that week.
And I am sorry. Right up front I will tell you that I am truly sorry ---- but Forrest Whittaker's lazy eye stole my entire attention away. Is it looking at me? You? Keanu? Nope. He's watching some other dude off-screen. It was so distracting that I found myself looking away from the screen so that if he saw me, he wouldn't be embarassed (and if I was in person, now, I'd be doing a Christopher Walken doing a 'googly eyes' schtick. Count your blessings there).
I wanted a little blam, blam, clever plot, blam, blam again. And all I got was "Training Day" with a different cast. TD writer David Ayer was the Director here so that explains that.
Had a nice night out with wifey though. That can't be bad.
WiseGuy
Awww, at least wiseguy had a nice night out with his lady...sweet!!
Forrest Whitaker cracks me up. One eye is looking AT you and the other is looking FOR you. :D
Nicely put. He's two actors in one.
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